Making meaningful connections with new friends or business associates can be difficult.

Not the quick saying hello and making small talk kind of connection. I can do that with the best of them. My kids used to get so mad at me for having to acknowledge just about everyone we would run into doing errands. A couple of times, a classmate of theirs would be cashiering and I would start talking to them. My kids wouldn’t say a word. On the way out of the store, I would lecture them about being kind to everyone. They would usually just roll their eyes and say “Mom, it’s fine.”

But real meaningful connections are a different story for me. Now don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of close friends that I love dearly, but it’s the new or deeper connections that might help me make life a little more marvelous that are hard.

I often feel like I am on the outside looking in and I struggle to take the leap into different communities. I think that it probably goes back to my fear of judgment and putting myself out there.  What if they don’t like me? What if I say the wrong things? I’ll just stay over here where I don’t have to get too involved.

My husband Dave can make friends and connections very easily. I often tease him that the moment he talks to someone new he gets invited on a sports trip of some kind with them.

In a meditation series I listened to with Deepak Chopra, he said, “Through isolation, we wither, but in community, we experience a deep sense of belonging, purpose, and joy.”

I’m learning to step out and be a part of the community. Do you want to join me?

My Word of the Year

When I was working out my word of the year this year, Connection was the one that surfaced.

This is what I wrote in my word of the year post.

When I was journaling about what I wanted to accomplish next year and setting a big vision, these three things came up over and over.

• Taking care of my body
• Better relationships with family and friends
• A new direction in my business

Connection covers all three! I kept trying to come up with more words to choose from, but I couldn’t get away from connection.

And my favorite quote was,

“Connection is the energy that is created between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued.” Brene’ Brown

 

So, I am working on making new meaningful connections.

One way this has worked for me so far is this.

I had a friend that I volunteered with while our kids were in school together. We lost touch as our kids went their separate ways. I noticed a post of hers on Facebook about a new business. I reached out to learn more about it. We met for coffee. She is a life coach, so we met a few times and she helped me work out a few things with my business. She then introduced me to someone else who does business coaching. I joined a group and now I am a part of about 40 beautiful souls who have so much knowledge and positive energy. This group is bringing me the connections I need to live my purpose. The encouragement, knowledge, and focus I needed to start writing my book. That was all from one person, one meaningful connection!

Who can you reach out to today? If that still scares you too, here are a few easy ways to get started.

11 Easy Ways to Make Meaningful Connections

Social Media

If you use social media, be active. Don’t just read about others’ lives, interact. Let people know you are there and like what they are saying. Comment, like, and encourage. Most people who are posting on social media are looking to be seen and liked. Be that person. You will be appreciated, and you are making a connection.

Get out into the world

Social media is a great place to keep up with friends and meet new ones, but you need to get out from behind your computer. You need to see people face to face. Show up in the world. Accept invitations to go out. Be kind to others when out in public.

Be curious

Who do you need in your life? What do you need to learn and who has that information? Find resources and then reach out. Ask people questions about what they love to do.

New experiences

Go to stores, museums, parks, concerts, or coffee shops you have never been to before. You might run into people you know or strike up a conversation with a new friend who has the answer to something you need.

“Meaningful connection is formed when we bravely share our truth.” Michell Maros

Join groups

Join a special interest group, sports team, workshop, or volunteer somewhere. By doing this, the hard part is over because you already have something in common. Create your own group!

Share your story

“Our stories hold power. Where we’ve been. What we’ve faced. How we’ve been hurt, and how we’ve failed. They all shape who we’ve become. And our stories can change the world.”Jacque Watkins

When you share your own story, you will open a door for others to connect with you.

Be open to randomness

Be open to serendipity and random connections. The universe is always bringing people into our life that we need or are looking for. Be aware of the people you are standing or sitting next to in public places.

Be helpful

Find ways to help others. Reach out to friends or acquaintances that are struggling by bringing a meal, sending a card, or just an encouraging text. Pay attention to when your friends might need a helping hand and reach out.

Be intriguing

Enjoy your company and have fun. Don’t use your time with friends to complain and be sure to put your phone away. Be the one who makes the plans every once in a while and invites others. Show up as yourself.

Detach from proving yourself and allow yourself to just be.

Let go of your insecurities

Let go of your fear of rejection or judgment. You will never know if someone can help you or have coffee with you or just hang out with you if you don’t ask. If someone tells you no, let it go. Move on. The worst thing you can do is think about all of the reasons you were turned down. I’m sure none of them are the truth.

“We can improve our relationships with others by leaps and bounds if we become encouragers instead of critics.” Joyce Meyer

Stay in contact with your most important people

Don’t forget about all of the important people who are already in your life. It probably seems like a full-time job to keep up with all of them, but just reaching out every so often makes a big impact. Don’t always be the one waiting for them to reach out to you.

You may be thinking I have enough friends, or I don’t have time for more connections, but out of the 7 billion people in this world, I bet there is someone else who could enhance your life.

It doesn’t have to be hard, you just have to take a chance and reach out. One of these new connections can turn out to be the meaningful one you were looking for.

Life is too short to limit your meaningful connections. There are too many possibilities you could be missing out on. I’m opening myself up to all of them! Why else would we all be here?

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” Anars Nin

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