It’s easy to tell someone to “face your fears,” but not so easy to do it. I have a lot of fears. A lot of them have to do with animals of some sort. Bears at my cabin, bats in my house, going out in the dark alone because something might jump out at me, or falling in the lake because a fish might bite me. All fears may be irrational but are real. There is a possibility of some kind of danger, but I can face them by protecting myself and being smart.
It’s the fears that are part of our imagination that are harder to face. The fears that hold us back from pursuing our dreams. For me, the one that I have the hardest time with is the fear of judgment.
I do not fear judgment about my body or looks anymore; I have learned to face that and not worry about what I look like. However, now my goal is to face my fear of what other people might think or say about me.
(This is the first of a three-post series. Read these next: Making Dreams Come True and Manifest Miracles using the Power of the Universe.)
My Fears
I do not like thinking someone doesn’t like me or is laughing at or judging something I am doing. I tend to live my life not to create any conflict. Always wanting to fit in. I won’t state my opinion for fear someone won’t agree, and when I do state my opinion, I think about it for days wondering how I can take it back. If I am angry or don’t agree with someone, I tend to work it out in my own head instead of telling the other person. I put limits on my dreams because I’m afraid to put myself out there.
So, why in the world would I start blogging? That truly is the worst profession for someone afraid of what other people think. Every time I publish a post, I have to walk away from my computer so I don’t get sucked into checking whether anyone had read it, liked it, or commented on it yet.
Related Post: 9 Lessons I’ve Learned From Following My Passion
But then I have to get myself out of that funk and remember why I am doing this! I love blogging because I love writing and sharing ways to inspire others to make the most of their lives, and I learn along the way. If only one person reads something I wrote and got something out of it, I can be happy. My goal is to be a positive influence but to succeed from a business perspective, I need to kick my fears of judgment to the curb and get them out of my head. I have to be persistent, keep putting myself out there, and not worry about others’ opinions. I can no longer let my fears hold me back from pursuing my dreams, so I am facing them head-on!
“Instead of worrying about what people say of you, why not spend time trying to accomplish something they will admire.”
Dale Carnegie
Other Possible Fears
Do you have any fears like that? The fear of rejection, success, failure, the unknown, ridicule, abandonment, etc. These are all possible fears that can hold you back from living the life of your dreams.
To start facing our fears, I came up with the following wordplay to help us.
F – Fear is a figment of your imagination
E – Erase the limits you are putting on yourself
A – Appreciate and accept help from family and friends
R – (w)Rite them down and turn them around
(Let’s be clear, I am not talking to anyone who may be working with medical professionals about fears that are affecting your life.)
F – Fear is a figment of your imagination
If you think about it, most of our fears are projections of what might happen in the future or what we perceive is happening. It is another form of worrying. Something we should let go of. We can only control what is happening in our lives at this moment and what we know to be true. Do not let your thoughts of what other people are thinking hold you back because you are probably wrong!
E – Erase the limits you are putting on yourself.
If you are afraid to take a step in the direction of your dreams, you will never get there. Fearing what might happen if I put myself out there and risk judgment will keep me from doing what I love. This life is too short to be afraid of what could be. Make the most of this life and do not limit what is possible and what makes you happy.
A – Appreciate and accept help from family and friends.
Talk to your family and friends. Ask for their advice and find out what others are actually thinking of you. Make sure your family and friends understand what your dreams are and ask for their help.
R – (w)Rite them down and turn them around.
(I know, it’s a stretch, but I think it’s important.) Write down all of your dreams, big or small. Write down everything you are thinking about and wishing you could do. Then write down why you are not doing or pursuing them. What is holding you back? What fears are in place? The next step is to write down the worst that could happen if you actually faced your fears and pursued your dreams. Change your fears into motivation to go out and do it!
Life is too short to let your fears limit your happiness. Take baby steps to face your fears and keep moving forward. What fears do you have? Do you think it is time to face them and quit letting them hold you back from making the most of this life?
“What you are afraid to do is a clear indication of the next thing you need to do.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Do you want to explore this more? Subscribe to Living Marvelously for a resource that provides concrete steps and examples to help you face your fears. Look for FEAR on the Resources Page under Personal Development.
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