It seems that now that I am over 50 years old, I should have the confidence I need to do whatever I dream of. After all, I have a half-century of experience and lessons learned. But unfortunately, that was not true until I finally figured out one thing. The key to confidence in your 50s and really at any age is just to be you. Know that you were born with your own unique abilities. Those abilities are yours and yours alone. Only you can be an expert in your life. It cannot be compared or judged against anyone else’s life because they do not have the same ability!
Your unique ability may be:
- Loving mother
- Personable accountant
- Conversational writer
- Comfort food cook
- Lively communicator
- Quiet philanthropist
- Encouraging customer service rep
You are a unique person; no other human has your ability. Each person’s abilities are needed and necessary for our world to thrive. So, why would you not have confidence in something that only you can do?
What is confidence?
A feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.
When you shy away or hide your ability because you don’t think you are good enough, you break the chain. You are needed for someone else to feel confident and share their ability.
The key to confidence isn’t about feeling better than anyone else; it’s knowing that you are capable and not afraid to express it. To increase your confidence, let’s start with some confidence-building exercises.
Confidence Building Exercises
Get clear on what truly matters to you
What is the ability that you have that you are afraid to share? What truth are you hiding, or are afraid to speak out loud? Get clear on what you feel most compassionate about. It’s easier to be confident when you feel strongly about it.
Teach what you know
I love to teach. But unless I am comfortable with and truly know what I am about to teach, I don’t have much confidence. Start sharing your opinion in a conversational way. Start with the things you know and feel confident about.
Feel good about yourself
Take steps to love yourself. When you feel better and know you are doing things to feel good, you will be more confident in showing up and being seen. Move your body, eat well, get good sleep, do your spiritual work, and know that you are beautiful just as you are.
Just be yourself
Your confidence will explode when you stop trying to look, sound, or be like someone else. Others can see right through that. Being your authentic self is much more powerful.
“You are automatically led by your own natural inclinations and impulses to the roles that will please you most at any given point in your life.” from Infinite Possibilities by Mike Dooley
Learn what you don’t know
If you are clear on what truly matters to you but still don’t feel confident expressing it, learn more. Boost your confidence by reading, seeking teachers, and asking the Universe for help. The only caveat to this is that you have to put yourself out there to truly learn. You will never know everything, apply what you know and learn along the way.
Stop the negative self-talk
Feed your mind with positive things about yourself. Catch yourself when you put yourself down. Gently change that thinking. Know that you are loved and have the ability to create your dream life. How can you be insignificant in that scenario?
Reach out to new people
Make new connections. You will attract like-minded people when you are clear on what matters to you and start speaking your truth. Reach out and have coffee or join a group. It is easier to feel confident about your abilities when you are with other people who understand you. Hone your skill, and then feel more confident sharing it with others.
Do the things that make you happy
It only makes sense that the things that make us happy are the easiest to achieve. Feelings of happiness and joy have high vibrational energy, attracting high vibrational energy back.
Celebrate your achievements
Spend some time every day or every week looking back at all you have accomplished. Celebrate the little wins and the big wins. See that you are capable of achieving what you desire. Feel the confidence in all that you have already achieved.
When you truly exude confidence because you are aware of the key to confidence, miracles will happen.
You will be…
- Happier
- More sure of yourself
- Handling difficult situations more easily
- No longer comparing yourself to others
- Less afraid to try new things
- Attracting like-minded people into your life
Especially in your 50’s when you might have some time to reflect on all that you have done and time to reflect on what else you want to do; confidence should flow from your soul!
You still have years to accomplish more, and you have learned so much to this point. Your kids or others younger than you want to see that there is a purpose to all that they are doing. Be an example of doing what you love and living it!
So start today! Do little things every day to build your confidence.
- Adjust your posture – sit up straight
- Journal about your strengths and accomplishments
- Smile and small talk with strangers
- Remove negative people on social media
- Love yourself
- Set small goals you can reach everyday
- Help someone else
- Visualize the life of your dreams
- Make eye contact with whoever you are talking to
When you are conscious of and clear of your own unique abilities, the key to confidence in your 50s is just to be you. Be the person you were born to be and do the things that make you happy and fulfilled.
I’d love to hear if any of this resonates with you! Comment below about how you have built your confidence.
“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.” Dalai Lama
“Believe you can, and you are halfway there.” Theodore Roosevelt
“You are the only person on earth who can use your ability.”– Zig Ziglar
Let me help you get started on the path to clarity with my Living Marvelously Journal!
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You are definitely correct in all you say above. But, not everyone has been surrounded by a strong, loving, supportive family (or friends). Those that have been a very lucky!
So, to take this slightly further, there are some people that have been physically and mentally abused, by some ONE person, or possibly SEVERAL persons throughout their lives. For those people, the helpful instructions as written above are more difficult to start.
I believe that first it takes strength to become aware of your situation and then have the courage to change it and become your own, stronger person. Learn to believe in yourself, trust yourself and become individually strong.
Find people that will support you and learn from their kind words and motivation to become the confident person you should have been all your life……and whom you’ve always deserved to be.
It will be easier then, for those people to follow your very knowledgeable advice.
Thank you for that Colleen. That is very thoughtful advice.